I, Me, Myself August 9, 2020

A Litte Introduction

I don’t know myself.

I also think no one knows herself too well, either.

But we can agree to disagree on this one for now.

In the meantime, let me tell you ten things you most likely don’t know about me.

1. My first short story was published in Mod Magazine when I was fourteen. That’s right, magazines existed then. “I Was Only Nine” was my first stab at fiction writing. I had the audacity to send it through mail straight to the editor-in-chief knowing it would get printed in the Junior Section. It did. When you’re fourteen, you know that everything is possible. That was the year I got published, wrote a school play, and won in the Quiz Bee. Then I turned fifteen and nothing got published after that. That’s when that bit about reality kicked in. Now I wish we could all be fourteen so we can change the world.

2. I flew to Sydney then Melbourne by my lonesome in my early twenties when my marriage was falling apart. I had no money. I went to the market for the free samples for lunch. And stayed with friends. One day at a train station, a woman left her bag with me with her wallet and everything in it while she got the busted heel of her shoe fixed. She said the train would come in fifteen minutes and she’d be back by then. It taught me about trust. Trust. Kindness. Strangers.

3. I need proof. I can’t believe anything unless I see it with my own eyes. Remember this before moving to the next one.

4. I can manifest things. All I need to do is believe it already exists before it does. So, I had to unlearn No. 3. I will probably write about it one day. Simply put, everything starts in your mind. Believe it so badly that it becomes a reality. Want it so much that you get it. When we want things to happen, we have our own ways to get it. Some pray. Some set intentions. Some create a vision board. Some read The Secret. To me, all these intersect at one truth. They all mean the same to me.

5. I’m friends with Professor Jaime Licauco but the irony is that he doesn’t know my name. He recognizes my soul, my voice, my presence. I called him on the phone a month ago and he was angry at some stranger invading his silence. He was at home like the rest of us. But when he heard my voice, he recognized me. I talk to him at least once a year because I need him to remind me of the four universal laws. They are unassailable. And they make me a better human being. I will write about this, too. Soon. And, yes, we talked about this global pandemic and why it’s happening.

6. For all my cynicism and compulsive proof-finding, I tried to access my Akashic Book of Records. It’s the book that contains who you were, who you are, and who you are meant to be. And no one has actually seen it, for real, the actual book. It goes against probably all the things we believe in but the lengths I go to understand my life, this life, are extreme. Do I see you googling Akashic Records now? It’s like The Book of Shadows in Charmed. You’ll get the reference if you’re my age.

7. I’m proud of my little sisters. One wanted to be a nurse when it was a calling rather than a passport out of the country. She was in prep school and I bullied her about it. But she went to New York alone with the barest pocket money to take the nursing exam and passed with flying colors. The other became a mom when everyone thought it was too late. It was a difficult pregnancy but she had faith. They both don’t know the meaning of No. I’m older but I look up to them and please don’t tell them I wrote this!

8. I don’t believe in coincidence. I read this book maybe twenty years ago. Celestine Prophecy says there are no coincidences. The book says you meet people because they have a message for you. I’ve never forgotten.

9. I never forget. Favors given. Favors withheld. Good things given me. I forget where my reading glasses are but these I don’t. Ever.

10. I’m shallow. I’m a label snob. I like everything Hermes and Chanel. I don’t care if it’s a tiny soap shaped in camelia as long as it’s Chanel, I’ll love it! I bought a twilly to use as a ribbon just because it’s Hermes! I buy stuff I never use. I shop in the middle of the night. I love the feel of my Prada sneakers. I will choose to own just one pair of Prada instead of having a million other pairs. I can spot a fake a mile away and it’s a gift. I’m still a girl. Standing in front of a store. Asking the universe for a million bucks.

My top ten may confuse you.

It doesn’t give you a full picture. It’s a study in contrast. Or irony.

But that’s because a woman can never be defined. Ever.

B

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